Monthly Archives: May 2010

A Banner Ad by Any Other Name Would Suck as Much…

So I stumbled across this banner ad, obviously a “unique” advertisement for Philadelphia tourism. Interesting, because I just so happened to talk about an ad campaign for St. Louis tourism that was particularly unique not more than a week ago… let’s compare, shall we?

Now, granted, it’s not too bad of a banner in itself. In fact, I was intrigued enough (does it help that I write ads for a living?) to click through, naturally expecting to find a payoff for the question posed. Not only could I not even click through (literally. no action occurred on click), but after I actually typed in the URL (which 99.999992% of your audience will NOT do – even if their lives were in jeopardy), there was no pay off, no acknowledgement that I followed the ad, hell, not even ONE mention of the ad at all.

Now, the site is nice, sure (I’m not going to link to it, for that would just help these lazy fools out by increasing site hits)… but there’s a very basic understanding between advertisers and all us poor slobs: if you come upon that very rare formula that gets us to take interest with your ad versus one of the other 300 or so we see every hour, DO SOMETHING WITH IT! Phew. Okee.

So there’s really no point in comparing this ad to the well executed, well defined and well differentiated one for St. Louis. I guess let’s just chalk this up to a weekly bitch-out session on what not to do with your audience’s very very very (99.99992%) limited attention.

Plus, I didn’t really want to go to Philly anyway.

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Filed under Bad Buzz

Nike Soccer: Now with the Ability to See into the Future!*

*Must be a world-class football star and get paid boatloads of cash in order to see into future.

Just on time and just on point, the latest Nike soccer commercial launched as the frenzy of the World Cup is reaching a breaking point. Using their proven formula of high-priced stars, whiplash-inducing flash cuts and futuristic plots, Nike has… done it yet again. Enjoy.

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Filed under Great Advertising, Great Viewing

World Cup-onomics

With the much anticipated 2010 World Cup only two weeks away, the majority of the world is preparing for a sharp dip in work productivity (especially in the States where the games play during the busy am hours everyday for a month) when the first kickoff occurs on June 11th.

Lucky for you, dear worker bee, now there’s a World Cup guide that you might be able to pass off as a TPS report without your boss being any the wiser. The good folks at Goldman Sachs (can they do no wrong?!) have once again put together their official “The World Cup and Economics” guide, which reviews the history of the sport, provides bios on teams and players, explores links between the beautiful game and macroeconomic factors and even makes some bold predictions on the upcoming tourney (Germany coming in as runners up? I say “NEIN!”).

Proving that even the most popular and exciting sporting event in the world can be geeked up by near-sighted number crunchers, this guide is the ultimate thinking man’s WC companion – and will ensure that you won’t be watching the games on your couch in your undies while sifting through the employment classifieds.

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Filed under Great Copy, Great Reading

EvoLOLution

Wow, look how far we’ve come.

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A Celebration of Chicago Suds

Beer. As a wise man once pronounced, “the solution to and cause of all of life’s problems.” We already know that beer is a great way to forget about heartbreak  or the fact that you just messed up royally at work or that you don’t even have a girl to lose or job to squander away. And it’s cheaper than therapy to boot. Ah, beer.

As if you need yet another reason to chug the mighty brew, here’s one more anyway: we’re half a pint deep into Chicago Craft Beer Week 2010. With all of the city’s top brewmasters showing off their skills – and you showing off your aptitude for singing Billy Joel ballads off pitch – there’s no reason to check out the official site for special tastings and events.

After all, beer is one of main causes for the beginning of civilization… and most likely an eventual reason for its destruction. Prost!

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Filed under Great Sips

Hell Is Just an Extended Job Interview

Ugh… the dreaded job interview. Whether you wore the slacks with the giant hole in the crotch or you mistakenly called the interviewer ‘mom’, we’ve all have some gems to retell over a few beers at the bar. And with unemployment continuing its rise into the upper jet stream, we’re pretty much assured a steady diet of horrible job interview stories for a long time to come.

Organizing and expounding just a wee bit upon all these great stories is Golden Grant – a microsite ode to the most legendary awkward moments know to the working (or non working) world. It’s the perfect thing to waste away those boring days on the job and – after your boss finds out about all the time you waste watching videos on the internet – you too can add your own embarrassing yarns from the dozens and dozens of interviews that are waiting for you.

Don’t worry, you’re not unemployed, you’re just NSFW.

Okee, in all fairness, I’m a little biased because my kid brother did the animation for these, but still, they’re still damn good stuff.

Find more at www.GoldenGrant.com.

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Filed under Great Advertising, Great Sites, Great Viewing

You AutoComplete Me…

Ever wonder how Google’s predictive search bar can be so accurate? I mean, how did Google know that I was wondering “What happens when… tarantulas crawl up my nostril hole?”

AutoCompleteMe.com takes a look at some of the more eyebrow raising predictive searches that Google comes up with. And remember, this means hundreds of people are searching for things like “Will we poop in heaven”… hundreds. I mean, it is a valid question, afterall.

No wonder Google is taking over the world.

Yeah, me either...

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